Tony Hawk has a problem.
Many people know the name “Tony Hawk”. It’s synonymous with skateboarding. He named video games after him and in general he has permeated cultural consciousness so that most of the people in America know him on some level. The problem is, most of these people either don’t know what he looks like, can’t know exactly how they got his name, or don’t believe he is the real Tony Hawk.
Exactly that is not a problem, but you have to imagine that it makes aspects of your life very strange. Imagine walking around all day and having people who don’t believe you are who you say you are, or think you are, or generally put the nature of yours Existence in question. I’m sure there is a name for this phenomenon, but I wouldn’t know where to start. Here are just a few examples:
TSA agent (checking my ID): “Hawk, like that skateboarder Tony Hawk!”
Her: “Cool, I wonder what he’s up to these days.”
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) March 21, 2017
Child in the skate park:
“Are you Tony Hawk?”
i: i am
him: “no you are not”
Me: Ok, I am not
him: “but are you really?”
Me: I really am
he: I thought you’d look younger
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) July 29, 2019
At Disneyland with kids waiting in line for churros. Girl in front of me: “You look like Tony Hawks”
Me: is that good?
she amazes: “I think so”
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) June 15, 2019
Went to a supermarket on my way to skate and approached the counter with water & advil (i’m old). The clerk sees me: “You look like someone.”
me: oh yes?
him: “What’s your name?”
him: “Last name?”
him: “you are him?”
he: “no fee, but you owe me a selfie”
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) June 19, 2019
Guy walks up to me while standing in line at the Cancun cafe.
Him: My friend says you are a famous person. Is that true?
Me: It depends on your definition of fame
Him: Will you appear on Google if I search for your name?
He (taps on the phone): Are you Tony Stark?
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) April 3, 2019
TSA Agent (stares intently): I’m trying to figure out what you look like before I check your ID.
TSA: that cyclist Armstrong!
Agent Nearby: This isn’t Lance Armstrong
Me: he’s right
TSA: Oh, you look like that skateboarder (checks ID). Same last name too! Crazy!
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) August 21, 2018
Surfing in Hawaii, paddling to the lineup. Guy paddles next to me: “Someone tells you you look like Tony Hawk.”
I (think he knows the meme): “Yes, but you are the first today”
Him: “You should tell people you are and then sign his name, haha”
His friend: “He’s real”
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) February 28, 2021
Follow up: I asked his name and he said Irving. I told him my name was Tony, to which he sarcastically replied “like Tony Hawk haha”
and then he went.
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) October 31, 2019
Bizarre right? Well, we can all rest assured that as of today someone has finally recognized Tony Hawk.
Other Nurse: It’s true, and she’s still skating. I blame you when she was injured and I was low on staff for a week.
Me: I sincerely apologize. Don’t do a kickflip.
– Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) May 26, 2021
I am sure he is finally feeling fulfilled.